After no results on the scale the last month and a half - I had a mini melt down and took a "vacation" from working out...sort of! I have been still trying to run outside and eating "OK".
My daughters' softball season started last week and she has two practices during the week which TOTALLY threw off my workout schedule and meals! That coupled with my frustration on the scale caused me to eat my emotions last Saturday for the first time in a long time. I felt like shit the next day! But it left me to start looking at what I have been doing, what has been working, what hasn't and exploring other methods.
The first thing I KNOW I MUST DO is TRACK! No, not running track...but tracking my food! I have about 20 excuses as to why I don't do it...mainly I don't want to live my life tracking what I eat and wanted to be able to do this with out doing so....but, in the end I think I have not been eating ENOUGH. Weird, right!!!! I feel like all I do is eat....but calorie wise it is not enough. I also know I have not been eating enough protein.
Second, I need more water! I try really hard to drink water...but I hate water! No taste at all....So, I am going to measure out exactly how much I need to be drinking and force myself to drink it all....
Third, I need to push myself in my workouts more and I think I need more of a routine...not just "Oh, I will do this today...." So, again I need to start PLANNING my workouts in more detail a week at a time at least!
Finally....I need to stick with this shit! I have a bad habit of not finishing things (except for wine, I can finish a bottle of wine!) I am literally going to start planning out my entire life a week at a time - hour for hour - and hang it up where I can see it!!!!! My ADD doesn't allow for me to track shit in my head anymore...I forget things left and right and don't remember until I am about to fall asleep...and lets face it, once my ass is in bed the only thing that will get me up is either A) John Rzeznik nekkid at my door or B) my house is on fire....
So, I am committing to do the following for the Month of April...
1) Meal Planning for the week each Friday for the upcoming week (M-Sun)
2) Workout Planning for the week each Friday for the upcoming week
3) Before & After pictures & measurements (I promise to post these results )
4) Consume between 1700 - 2100 calories/day and drink 112 oz. of water/day
5) Post at least once a week to my blog!!!!
I will end on a positive note:
The old me would not have just taken a "vacation" - I would have quit and gained the 25 pounds back that I worked so hard to lose! So I deserve a pat on the back for not giving up! We all get to that point where we want to give up....sometimes it might take longer to evaluate what is going wrong...but we need to just keep moving forward!
Also, I was looking through some IG pics from December and I noticed that it took me almost 20 minutes to do a mile....I think my mile is currently at 15 min (on a good day) now...I am proud of that 5 minutes I have shaved off because I am NOT a runner, my body was not designed for running...I struggle with my asthma EVERY TIME I GO OUTSIDE to run, I have even cried on a run because I was so frustrated with my body for not letting me do what my mind wants me to do....I do need to keep pushing myself because I do get a little freaked out when I get an attack and tend to talk myself out of a lot of the run or modifying what I set out to do...I need to STOP that and DO WHAT I SAY I AM GOING TO DO...it is OKAY if I need to walk. I just need to only walk until I catch my breath and then START RUNNING AGAIN! I want to be able to run a WHOLE MILE with out stopping. I don't even care about the time!
I GOT THIS!
Have a Fabulous Friday Loves!
Friday, March 29, 2013
Tuesday, March 19, 2013
Craptastic Day
I am going to blame my shitty day on PMS!
Last night I took my 12 week progress pics...and in the process I deleted my very first before pic! UGH! I have a copy of it in a collage....but it is now gone forever! Not to mention the fact that I have not lost a single pound since Feb. 1st and I can not see much of a difference...the hubs said my butt is smaller and my legs look smaller...but I need my gut to shrink! It is not good having skinny legs when I can't even go down a full, solid pants size! I don't want to look like a pig on stilts! This is why so many times before I lose motivation and go back to doing nothing....I am on the verge of this pattern again! I almost even deleted my blog....I have just been beside myself for about a week and was waiting to take the pictures to see if there was a difference....so it was a HUGE disappointment for me!
So, skip to today....All I have been thinking about today is quitting my job and how to still make ends meet! Long story for another day (and just in case anyone from work is reading this....I don't need any problems!)....I am just DONE! I don't hate my job, I just can't stand to breathe the same air as a few folks there. I am burned out!
The whole way home from work I just kept thinking about my run....I was going to do 2 miles and W4D1 of my 10K trainer. Figured that would put me in a better mood. NOT SO MUCH! First, I realized about 5 minutes in that I forgot to start my Polar FT4....Then, my asthma sucked balls today....I couldn't run for more than 2 minutes at a time...I had to stop early too because it was starting to get painful to breathe. So I only got 1.5 miles in. Then, I decided to skip the gym...just not feeling it, ya know.
If one more person tells me it is muscle I am just going to throw myself on the ground and cry until I vomit! When you are as big and fluffy as me....the muscle building shouldn't impact the scale until you get around 180....and I am far from it!
So, now that I am done feeling sorry for myself....I am just going to brush myself off and hope tomorrow is a better day!
Last night I took my 12 week progress pics...and in the process I deleted my very first before pic! UGH! I have a copy of it in a collage....but it is now gone forever! Not to mention the fact that I have not lost a single pound since Feb. 1st and I can not see much of a difference...the hubs said my butt is smaller and my legs look smaller...but I need my gut to shrink! It is not good having skinny legs when I can't even go down a full, solid pants size! I don't want to look like a pig on stilts! This is why so many times before I lose motivation and go back to doing nothing....I am on the verge of this pattern again! I almost even deleted my blog....I have just been beside myself for about a week and was waiting to take the pictures to see if there was a difference....so it was a HUGE disappointment for me!
So, skip to today....All I have been thinking about today is quitting my job and how to still make ends meet! Long story for another day (and just in case anyone from work is reading this....I don't need any problems!)....I am just DONE! I don't hate my job, I just can't stand to breathe the same air as a few folks there. I am burned out!
The whole way home from work I just kept thinking about my run....I was going to do 2 miles and W4D1 of my 10K trainer. Figured that would put me in a better mood. NOT SO MUCH! First, I realized about 5 minutes in that I forgot to start my Polar FT4....Then, my asthma sucked balls today....I couldn't run for more than 2 minutes at a time...I had to stop early too because it was starting to get painful to breathe. So I only got 1.5 miles in. Then, I decided to skip the gym...just not feeling it, ya know.
If one more person tells me it is muscle I am just going to throw myself on the ground and cry until I vomit! When you are as big and fluffy as me....the muscle building shouldn't impact the scale until you get around 180....and I am far from it!
So, now that I am done feeling sorry for myself....I am just going to brush myself off and hope tomorrow is a better day!
Monday, March 11, 2013
Breakfast!
I suck really bad at breakfast during the work week....I never have enough time to make anything and Bananas and yogurt go quick in my house. I found these recipes on pinterest and decided to give it a shot....this way breakfast will not be skipped!
The first thing I made was Oatmeal Breakfast Bars - no sugar or flower added...well, sort of.
INGREDIENTS
1 1/2 cups of Quick or Old Fashion Oatmeal
2 ripe bananas (mash until creamy)
1 cup of unsweetened applesauce
1/3 cup of raisins (I opted for a mixture of cranberries, dried pomegranate seeds and chocolate chips. But you could really add anything you like)
1/4 cup of chopped walnuts (I opted for cashews on the tops..I am not a fan of walnuts)
1 tsp vanilla extract
1 tsp cinnamon (I used about 2 because I love cinnamon!)
Directions
1) Preheat heat oven to 350 degrees.
2) Mix vanilla extract & cinnamon into the applesauce.
3) Blend applesauce mixture with all other ingredients & let sit for 10 minutes
4) Drop dough, by spoonfuls, onto a cookie sheet & flatten cookies into long rectangles.
5) Bake approx. 20 - 30 minutes, or until golden & done.
Here is my finished Product! They are a little on the chewy side....I just piled them into a Tupperware container and left them on the counter. I made 12 good size bars, about the size of my palm.
My next adventure was to find something my daughter would eat for breakfast....I am trying to get her to eat more veggies. So, I tried out Chocolate Zucchini Muffins....and these were a hit! In fact, I just made them yesterday and they are almost gone!
INGREDIENTS
1½ cups white whole wheat flour
1 cup all purpose flour
2½ tsp baking soda
1 tsp baking powder
1 tsp salt
2 tsp instant coffee crystals
¾ cup sugar
¾ cup brown sugar
½ tsp ginger
1½ tsp cinnamon
5 ounces Semi-Sweet chocolate, melted
1 cup extra virgin olive oil
4 large eggs
2 tsp pure vanilla extract
4 cups shredded zucchini
1 cups dark chocolate chips
Directions
1) Preheat oven to 425 degrees.
2) In large bowl, mix together flours, baking soda, baking powder, salt, instant coffee, sugar, brown sugar, ginger and cinnamon. Set off to the side.
3) In medium bowl, Whisk together oil, eggs and vanilla for about 2 minutes.
4) Slightly press zucchini to drain some of the juice off. You don't want it to be too dry...but just get as much as you can out.
5) Add zucchini to dry ingredients and toss to coat.
6) Pour melted chocolate into bowl with dry ingredients and mix well.
7) Add oil and egg mixture and mix well.
8) Using a large spoon, fill muffin tins or muffin pan.
9) Bake in top third of preheated oven at 425 degrees for 11 minutes.
10) Turn oven down to 325 degrees and continue baking for 11 more minutes. (Do not open the oven!)
11) Remove from oven and let cool for 5 minutes.
They are DELICIOUS! My daughter LOVED them - and these are way healthier than sugar coated cereal or pop tarts!
The first thing I made was Oatmeal Breakfast Bars - no sugar or flower added...well, sort of.
INGREDIENTS
1 1/2 cups of Quick or Old Fashion Oatmeal
2 ripe bananas (mash until creamy)
1 cup of unsweetened applesauce
1/3 cup of raisins (I opted for a mixture of cranberries, dried pomegranate seeds and chocolate chips. But you could really add anything you like)
1/4 cup of chopped walnuts (I opted for cashews on the tops..I am not a fan of walnuts)
1 tsp vanilla extract
1 tsp cinnamon (I used about 2 because I love cinnamon!)
Directions
1) Preheat heat oven to 350 degrees.
2) Mix vanilla extract & cinnamon into the applesauce.
3) Blend applesauce mixture with all other ingredients & let sit for 10 minutes
4) Drop dough, by spoonfuls, onto a cookie sheet & flatten cookies into long rectangles.
5) Bake approx. 20 - 30 minutes, or until golden & done.
Here is my finished Product! They are a little on the chewy side....I just piled them into a Tupperware container and left them on the counter. I made 12 good size bars, about the size of my palm.
My next adventure was to find something my daughter would eat for breakfast....I am trying to get her to eat more veggies. So, I tried out Chocolate Zucchini Muffins....and these were a hit! In fact, I just made them yesterday and they are almost gone!
INGREDIENTS
1½ cups white whole wheat flour
1 cup all purpose flour
2½ tsp baking soda
1 tsp baking powder
1 tsp salt
2 tsp instant coffee crystals
¾ cup sugar
¾ cup brown sugar
½ tsp ginger
1½ tsp cinnamon
5 ounces Semi-Sweet chocolate, melted
1 cup extra virgin olive oil
4 large eggs
2 tsp pure vanilla extract
4 cups shredded zucchini
1 cups dark chocolate chips
Directions
1) Preheat oven to 425 degrees.
2) In large bowl, mix together flours, baking soda, baking powder, salt, instant coffee, sugar, brown sugar, ginger and cinnamon. Set off to the side.
3) In medium bowl, Whisk together oil, eggs and vanilla for about 2 minutes.
4) Slightly press zucchini to drain some of the juice off. You don't want it to be too dry...but just get as much as you can out.
5) Add zucchini to dry ingredients and toss to coat.
6) Pour melted chocolate into bowl with dry ingredients and mix well.
7) Add oil and egg mixture and mix well.
8) Using a large spoon, fill muffin tins or muffin pan.
9) Bake in top third of preheated oven at 425 degrees for 11 minutes.
10) Turn oven down to 325 degrees and continue baking for 11 more minutes. (Do not open the oven!)
11) Remove from oven and let cool for 5 minutes.
They are DELICIOUS! My daughter LOVED them - and these are way healthier than sugar coated cereal or pop tarts!
Friday, March 8, 2013
People Suck!
Before I was fat....I was very social! I still try to be but it has been hard....I always feel like people are judging me because of my weight!
So, I started running outdoors, alone....by myself...and as the first week is coming to an end the only thing I enjoy about running outdoors....is that I don't have to hold my farts in! People SUCK! Some guy drove by and yelled something at me yesterday. I have no clue what he said because my music was up so loud I only caught it out of the corner of my eye...but I am pretty fucking sure he wasn't asking for my phone number. Then...there are those who stare...there were 2 teenager chicks sitting in parked car and I got all self conscious...and my inner paranoid fat girl starts talking to me..."Those girls are making fun of you...turn at this corner, your house is just right there. QUICK...HIDE...EVERYONE IS STARING..... OMFG! Why are they looking at you, I bet they are laughing and calling you names.." And I kept hearing this in my head...over and over and over...
This is my inner struggle...everyone has one! I really care about what others think of me, even strangers...and the last thing I want is to have my feelings hurt....regardless of who it is. At least 5 times in the 30 minutes I ran yesterday I just wanted to quit and go home....at least at the gym no one really cares...almost no one anyway....
So, next week I am going to try to get the inner skinny girl to come out...and when the inner fat girl starts in, she needs to say something...like.....UP YOURS!
In other news...I am down a total of 22 pounds! YAY! Two more weeks until I get to take my progress pictures and I am CHOMPING at the bit! I can really tell a difference in my clothes finally! I am going to go through all my clothes this weekend....maybe take some pics of things that don't quite fit so I have another comparison for when they do...and I know how much people like to see pictures of progress, I know it motivates me. I can't wait until I get to the point where I actually NEED to buy new clothes! I have clothes in bins and bags that I haven't been able to wear in almost 10 years...I pulled down a few pairs of jeans that fit about 4 years ago and have been wearing them...some are a little snug still but they fit!!!! I guess it is kind of like shopping when you pull things out that still have tags on them.
I use to just buy stuff with out trying it on because I didn't want to get upset at the store and ruin everyone's day with my sour puss mood...so needless to say there are still items with tags.
So, I started running outdoors, alone....by myself...and as the first week is coming to an end the only thing I enjoy about running outdoors....is that I don't have to hold my farts in! People SUCK! Some guy drove by and yelled something at me yesterday. I have no clue what he said because my music was up so loud I only caught it out of the corner of my eye...but I am pretty fucking sure he wasn't asking for my phone number. Then...there are those who stare...there were 2 teenager chicks sitting in parked car and I got all self conscious...and my inner paranoid fat girl starts talking to me..."Those girls are making fun of you...turn at this corner, your house is just right there. QUICK...HIDE...EVERYONE IS STARING..... OMFG! Why are they looking at you, I bet they are laughing and calling you names.." And I kept hearing this in my head...over and over and over...
This is my inner struggle...everyone has one! I really care about what others think of me, even strangers...and the last thing I want is to have my feelings hurt....regardless of who it is. At least 5 times in the 30 minutes I ran yesterday I just wanted to quit and go home....at least at the gym no one really cares...almost no one anyway....
So, next week I am going to try to get the inner skinny girl to come out...and when the inner fat girl starts in, she needs to say something...like.....UP YOURS!
In other news...I am down a total of 22 pounds! YAY! Two more weeks until I get to take my progress pictures and I am CHOMPING at the bit! I can really tell a difference in my clothes finally! I am going to go through all my clothes this weekend....maybe take some pics of things that don't quite fit so I have another comparison for when they do...and I know how much people like to see pictures of progress, I know it motivates me. I can't wait until I get to the point where I actually NEED to buy new clothes! I have clothes in bins and bags that I haven't been able to wear in almost 10 years...I pulled down a few pairs of jeans that fit about 4 years ago and have been wearing them...some are a little snug still but they fit!!!! I guess it is kind of like shopping when you pull things out that still have tags on them.
I use to just buy stuff with out trying it on because I didn't want to get upset at the store and ruin everyone's day with my sour puss mood...so needless to say there are still items with tags.
Thursday, March 7, 2013
The Stairs of Death!
That is what I call them anyway! I just have to say....don't let it intimidate you! I did 30 minutes on the lowest level and burned 250 calories!
Get your butt on it and OWN IT!
In other news...I started and ended the month of February at the same weight! Frustrating - BUT - I managed to get into some smaller pants at the end of the month! Remember, it is not just about the number....I am also down 3 pounds so far this month!!!
Get your butt on it and OWN IT!
In other news...I started and ended the month of February at the same weight! Frustrating - BUT - I managed to get into some smaller pants at the end of the month! Remember, it is not just about the number....I am also down 3 pounds so far this month!!!
Monday, March 4, 2013
My First 5K!
So, I ran in my very first 5K on Saturday.
My only goal for this race was to NOT finish last...and let me tell you, by the time we crossed the finish line - there were still people lined up to start! So, I reached my goal!!!
Advice for color runners - wear a painters mask to avoid getting that stuff up your nose and in your mouth and lungs. I wore a bandanna....that didn't help!
There were so many people that it kinda stressed me out a bit...I need to learn to relax! My darling husband and daughter were trying to take pictures of me....and I was not cooperating with them...I flipped the camera off every chance I could get...because I A) was struggling to breathe B) Annoyed by all the people in my way and C) I had to pee!
I love the look on Steph's face in this picture....My hands also look like Shreks' hands they were so swollen....mental note - DRINK MORE WATER THE DAY BEFORE!
So, even though I did alot of run/walk/run/walk....I finished about 10 minutes faster than I have been on the treadmill....we don't know our official time, I think it was around 46-48 minutes.
My poor face is even swollen....Oh, and even though I have lost 20 pounds....I still hate looking at myself in pictures. I still look like a puff ball!
It was a great experience - and not too bad for my VERY FIRST one...glad it wasn't super competitive. There were LOTS of walkers which made me a little bit more comfortable. I am not going to lie though...I hated every minute of the run except for the first 30 seconds and the last 30 seconds....I love BFF to pieces, she stayed with me which made me a little more irritable only because I know she can go faster and I felt like I was holding her back...I probably would have been nicer if I was alone...
So, my next 5K is April 20th...and there will be no colored starch up my nose, in my eyes...this one will be the Electric one. Glow in the dark sticks and what not! I am wondering how I am going to get this mess out of my car....since my daughter had to roll around in it RIGHT before we left!
Oh, and I might have lost my fucking mind because I am going to also sign up for the Bay to Breaker in May...which is a 12K - 7.5 miles - and I can't even run 1 mile...I wonder how I am going to do this! Starting my couch to 10K program this week OUTSIDE - I guess! Just keep moving forward!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)