Surgery is Cheating!

Where to start! 

I have been trying to start this blog for a little over 3 months...but not losing in the beginning caused me to keep deleting it.  Since October of 2012 I have lost 16.8 pounds and I finally feel like I have accomplished something.  In fact, I have accomplished quite a bit in the last few months thanks to 2 awesome friends and a wonderful group of ladies going through the same journey.

My journey is unique...as is everyone's.  I am an asthmatic and I also have osteoarthritis in my L2-L5 and T12 along with my left hip.  Those two things created a "I can't do that" attitude over the past 10 years.  In October I was at my heaviest and went to the Dr. because I had been in so much pain with my back that I couldn't take it anymore.  It was so bad I couldn't put on my underwear standing up!  I could BARELY shave my legs in the shower!  I had to learn to wipe sitting on the toilet!  And that is just the surface of how bad the pain was...that was everyday pain.  When it would flare up things were much worse.  My Dr. asked if I would be interested in Gastric Bypass...I cried.  1) Because I had no idea I was even heavy enough to be considered for the surgery and 2) because I would finally lose the weight with out having to ANYTHING!  Thats right, I didn't want to move my body...for fear of pain, for fear of alot of little things...Long story short, I was told I needed to gain about 5 - 10 more pounds before I could qualify (Red Tape that HMO's lay before you) as well as go through counseling and shit.  So even if I gained the weight there was a chance I still wouldn't get it done.  Then I heard a voice of a friend...a conversation a group of us mutual friends had about the surgery.  I still don't agree 100% with the attitude or opinions of everyone...but I heard the voice say "Surgery is cheating!"  Then it hit me!  YES, it is cheating...I am not a cheater!  I cried because I had got my hopes up...  I needed a kick in the ass!  And my friends voice calling me a cheater (not literally) was that kick in the ass!  I just chose not to listen to it before.

My buddy shared her little support group with me....and that day changed my life.  Seeing all the before and after pics of all these women (Some heavier than me) who busted ass to change!  In December I set out on a mission.
So, I have decided to FINALLY get this blog up...if no one reads it then at least I have my journey documented and can have something to be proud of!